The Most Defining Mommy Decision of My Life

Hey beautiful mommas! As you know, being a mommy is the most selfless, rewarding and challenging job you can have. I mean you want to do everything right and you're constantly second guessing yourself as to what is"right" for your child. When you get the opportunity to make parenting easier, you do it, right? Well, I just did the opposite, I decided to make a mommying decision that would make my everyday life just a little bit more hectic. I decided to leave my career as a high school teacher and become a stay at home mom.

I know you are probably thinking, why would you make a decision like that? Doesn't going to work give you a break from the kids? Isn't your job fulfilling and rewarding? Won't you get bored at home and have a desire to go back to work? This decision was a difficult, thorough and prayerful decision. It did not come easy and it was not an overnight decision, but it was the decision that was right for my family. So grab a coffee and a seat on the couch and let me walk you through how we made this decision.

THE WHY

You may be thinking why would I make this decision? How could anyone decide to leave a vibrant career to be home full time? This was a discussion my husband and I have had from the time we had our first child. We have three children now. It took us four years to pull the trigger. I loved my job and my students. It was hard to imagine not walking into my classroom each day and greeting them. But my heart was at home. I knew even before I got married that I wanted to be a stay-at- home mom or at least have the possibility to do so.

As we started having children, the conversation continued. Are we equipped to do this? Could we sustain ourselves on a single income? Is this a forever decision? These are some of the questions that were asked and worked through. Ultimately we decided that we would trust God and move forward in this decision. Personally, it was really important to me that I be the most influential person in my children's lives. I want to pour into them, teach them, encourage them, learn about them, cook for them, play with them and do all the things necessary to assist in developing this precious gift. Proverbs 22:6 has been my guiding verse and motivation to keep going. God tells us to "train up a child in the way he should go" and for me and my family this is the way we are choosing to live this out. This is my why. This life is not for everyone, so if you are considering making this move, make sure it's right for your family.

QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER WHEN DECIDING TO BE A STAY-AT-HOME MOM:

• Can we afford to make this move?

• Why do I want to be a stay-at-home-mom?

• What are the end goals of this journey?

• Do you have a support system?

• Does this support system understand and respect my decision, goals and beliefs for my family?

• What are the expectations you have of your spouse and he of you?

• How will you add in self care?

• Will you renew or re-certify any of your professional certifications or will all professional certifications and licenses be let go?

WHAT NOW

So the decision has been made, your letter of resignation has been submitted, now what? It's time to grieve. I knew that making the choice to come home would be hard, but I didn't realize how much of my identity was connected to my career. If you are making this life-altering decision, and yes, it is life altering give yourself a moment and a little grace to transition. Sit and. play with your kids for a few days, enjoy making your favorite meal that you may never have time to make. Take it easy before jumping into anything structured.

Once you have come to grips with the decision you made, it's time to get your hands dirty. Make a plan, goals, schedule, to-do lists. Remember even though you are at home, you are still working. This is what I had to do, and I created a schedule to help me focus. I have a type A personality, and structure is my best friend. I started my stay at home journey by structuring my days and thinking through the things I wanted to teach and model for my children. I had to remember that I came home for a specific reason, and I needed to let that guide my thinking and jump start my motivation.

IS THIS A FOREVER DECISION

Will I be a stay-at-home mom forever? The answer is, I don't know and I don't have to know. I just know that for right now, this is what my kids need from me. Once they become school aged, maybe I will go back to work. That is not a decision I have to make right now and neither do you. If you are trying to make this decision try to not think too far ahead. What do you believe you are being called to do? Then everything else will flow from there. This decision does not have to be permanent. Maybe you made the decision to stay at home and it's just not working for you, or your financial status has changed and you need to assist your family financially. It is okay, just make sure you are making the best choice you can for your family.

Hopefully this helps you or someone you know who is thinking of making the big leap and becoming a stay-at-home mom. As always, this is my mommy journey and I am here to support you along yours!